The Flu Sucks...

It is good for weight loss though isn't it?
Well, I'm not even sure if it's the flu... Ray said it probably is because of how my whole body was aching and how bad I felt... but I have no idea. Flu, stomach virus, something that SUCKS.

Let's back up a little bit :)
Last time I was here, I had felt kind of sick a day before, but felt all better. I was drinking coffee like crazy and working my butt off cleaning the house. Even so, a day later I gained a pound for Friday's weigh in, so the scale said...

286.2

a 1 pound gain :(

NO treadmill, or Crunches
Total Loss: 33.8 pounds

We had pizza (2 pieces for me) Friday for lunch, and I had iced coffee all day.

I made Ray's favorite Cheezy Chicken for dinner for his Bday :) I only make it once a year for him lol. But I wasn't really hungry, and when I did eat it... I didn't really taste it, and ate pretty slow and not much. (any other year I would have had at least 2 giant helpings, this year one small) I was proud, and couldn't wait to write that here! I wasn't thinking about feeling sick or anything, I had been fine for 2 days.

Well, I had planned on drinking and everything Friday night... but I only got 1 shot. I started feeling really funny. Then around 10:30 I got those pains in my stomach... I got up to the bathroom... and began my night of vomiting. :(

I came back down, but I really felt like crap. I couldn't even wait for one of my brothers to come in from smoking, and one hadn't even gotten there yet. But I had to go to bed. I spent the rest of the night either dead asleep or puking my guts out... not just your average puke either, the kind where you BETTER be sitting on the toilet... yeah you know what I'm talking about lol. (It's funny now, but at the time not so much...) I lost count after 7 times, but I woke up for this spewing of bodily fluids a LOT. (I'm just so thankful it was in enough time to get to the bathroom every time!!!)

To show you just how much... That weight of 286.2 Friday morning? By Saturday morning it was 281. That's 5.2 pounds in one night, even though I ate cheezy chicken and pizza that day... so yeah. And Sunday morning, down another pound. So the Flu is good for weight loss I guess...

I am feeling better today. My stomach still feels kind of bad after I eat something, but I'm keeping it down. I'm back up to 282.5 which is still about 4 pounds down from Friday's weigh in.

Being sick sucks. I can't remember the last time I was that sick, and I hope I'm not again for a LONG time.

I'm still feeling really tired and weak, but SO much better. I've been sleeping a lot. If I didn't have to bring the boy to school, I'd probably never leave my bed...

Been going to bed at about 10, so that's good. Tonight it will be more like 11, but it's still better than it was! And I'm going to try and keep it that way.

No fast food, I don't even want it. I hope that feeling stays even after my stomach is back to normal!

Ray got it too :( Not as bad as mine, he only threw up once, but still. He had to call in Monday, and came home early this morning. He has to go in tonight, I hope he feels all better :( I feel really bad, nice birthday present huh???

OH, and now neither one of us can even stomach the THOUGHT of his favorite food, Cheezy Chicken! That is just crazy... but being so sick may have ruined it for me, forever!!!

I haven't been on the computer AT ALL, that's how bad I was feeling. I hope to get back to a more normal blogging schedule, but even before this I wasn't doing it everyday. So I won't promise EVERY day, but I'll really try and do more. I need to record what I eat, otherwise I'll probably go back to eating too much. And Nothing will keep me away from Friday weigh in (except the flu lol) :)

My eating has been ok, only because of being so sick. So I've been eating a lot less. But when I do eat, I can't say it's the best choices, I haven't had the energy to prepare me anything good... so it was what ever was quick and would stay down. (cereal, ice cream, freeze pops are some examples) Last night I did make some Orange chicken and broccoli. It was pretty good, and even though I didn't eat much, I still felt like I over ate. Tonight it was broccoli tuna helper. It was good, and I only ate about 3/4 cup. I'm going to be careful and only eat a little at a time. Even though being sick really sucks, I should take advantage of the weight loss and the stomach shrinkage right?

Definitely trying to be positive about it lol. Now I don't have as far to go to be back in the green :)

I hope everyone else has been doing a lot better than me!!!!!

I planned on reading and catching up, but now I feel sooo tired :(

I'm going to bed. But I'll be back tomorrow to at least read!!! Goodnight! 

I don't know WHAT happened...

Honestly, I don't :(

I really felt GREAT, especially after meeting that goal last week! I felt like I was motivated as much as I was back in January. For the first time in a LONG time.

The weekend wasn't great, but it didn't ruin my mood or my determination.

Monday morning I started off with more BBQ chips. I realized, there weren't many left at all. I finished them. Meaning, I had eaten the WHOLE bag by myself over 3 days. I said to myself: What the hell are you doing?!?! And I did GREAT the rest of the day. I stuck to the plan, did housework, ate a sandwich for lunch on the 'sandwich thins' with baby carrots. Did the treadmill at 1pm which worked out so well! I stayed on it a little longer: 30 minutes/ 1.18 miles, Incline 1 with 2 ob weights for 5 minutes and I felt so good. I really love having it done and out of the way too! I only had ONE cookie. I did good with dinner, eating only one portion. And I snacked on measured out almonds. I got in 51 oz of water! The day was great.
Then... I don't know what happened.
It was 10:30pm, and Ray was hungry... we... ordered pizza. I know I have a pizza problem, but we haven't ordered it in the middle of the night for a snack since before I started this Jan 2010!!! (And even though it was his idea, if I would have said no- he wouldn't have. I was totally all for it.) Medium 12 inch. I had 5 pieces. FIVE. :( I found comfort in the fact they were small... but later? When I was done? I felt like SHIT. I couldn't believe I did that!!!!! 5 pieces of pizza in the middle of the night!?!?!?! OMG!!!  I still can't believe I did that.
Today wasn't any better. I was depressed. I'm sure mostly because I had eaten the pizza.
Let me be clear: I didn't eat because I was depressed, I was in a GREAT mood Monday. Even when we ordered it! I honestly don't know why I did it! I sure wasn't hungry... ugh.

So today I was depressed. I went to bed after sending the boy off to school, and I didn't get up till 11:30. I snacked all day. Not a lot at a time, but all through the day. And again, when I wasn't really even hungry. I didn't have lunch, and had a small portion of chicken with red beans and rice for dinner. I didn't want food, because I felt really sick. I had snacked all day on almonds, a trail mix bar, cereal and sun chips... and now I feel sick. I don't get sick often. Hardly EVER. But today I got pains in my stomach, that really hurt. That turned into a sick feeling. Without getting to graphic, I've spent a lot of the evening on the toilet.
That's what I get for filling my body with a bunch of crap.
I am so embarrassed.
I wasn't even going to write at all. I figured I'll come back when I'm feeling better and all will be well. BUT you know me. I would have felt guilty. On top of that, over at Jo's blog yesterday, she happened to ask: What is our responsibility, as bloggers, to our followers? I answered, that the only 'responsibility' I feel I have to my followers is to always be HONEST.
Well, I've always been and always will be. Even though I had a horrible couple days, I HAVE to share that, because it's part of my journey and I can't leave it out just because it sucks. Or because I am so ashamed of it. Which I am.
I'm still feeling depressed, now along with sick to my stomach. BUT I don't want to snack anymore. I don't want to eat ANYTHING. I can't change what I did the last 2 days, but I can do better tomorrow.

I REALLY was feeling so great and so motivated. I just want that back. I'm going to get up tomorrow and do my best. No matter my mood, I won't eat like I did today. I won't eat unless I'm hungry, no mindless snacking. I hope I don't feel sick tomorrow, but if I do it's my own fault!

I did weigh myself for my weight loss tracker, and it wasn't pretty.
I also got on the treadmill during The Biggest Looser. Ugh, I didn't want to. I put it off till the last 15 minutes of the show. My heart wasn't in it and I hated it the whole time. But I did it.
20 minutes/ .77 mile, Incline 1
I think I'm done with The Biggest Looser. I've watched since the beginning, except for one season. But I am having issues with this season, big time. It's not inspiring me this time, but only pissing me off. Which is crazy, I never would have thought I'd stop watching.

Anyway. Thanks for hanging in there with me.

I hope you all are doing well. Better than me at least!

Monday, A Little Better

First I have to say hello to the newest person to join me in my day, SkippyMom! I have seen this name since I FIRST started to read blogs back with Stacy's about 6 months ago, I'm so glad you visited mine :)

Also thank you AE, SkippyMom, Michaela, and Babe for your concern yesterday. That was so nice, I so appreciate it. I was feeling just AWEFUL. I have heard of heat stroke but didn't really realize what it was, I kept blaming Ray and breakfast :) I've been drinking a lot of water and using lots of aloe. I still feel pretty sick, and use the bathroom QUITE often, but no vomiting today. So that's a definite plus! I've had a head ache all day and just been laying around again. My face is starting to get less red, but also looking like it might peel, yuck :(  My chest is still very red and my arms too. I had to go to the store and get a prescription today, and let's just say I am so thankful for the drive through pick up! I look like a hot mess! lol, I am hopeful tomorrow will be better. I have no energy, I'm going to hurry it up and go to bed.

Today is Monday, time to weigh in again. The scale said...

That is down 0.8 since last Monday.

I would be happy with that, except I KNOW it's not accurate.

After the day and night I had, I expected to be down 5 pounds! Since I was only down .8, that tells me that I must have gained, if it weren't for being so sick I would definitely be up. So no Woo Hoo for me this week. We'll just have to wait and see what next Monday brings :)

Here's My Day:

Lunch: 1/2 sub, couple bites of chili cheese fries, 3 bites of my Italian pasta salad, water

Dinner: 1 slice of whole wheat toast with butter and peanut butter, 1/2 large apple, 3 oz chocolate milk

Total Water: 45 oz

I am trying to drink a lot of water, because I'm sure I should or I'd be dehydrated. But my stomach hurts and after I drink it I have to run to the bathroom... I should keep drinking though I guess... I didn't eat much for lunch, but what I did eat wasn't very good I know. I just did what was easy, because I just couldn't get myself to make anything. But tomorrow I will eat better even if I still feel like crap. Eating healthy would probably help anyway. If I have to I'll ask Ray to make me a bowl of soup :)

Oh, I have to mention that I slept right through the alarm this morning, and once up didn't feel like rushing or even leaving the house... so my son got to stay home, he was happy lol. I didn't have to go get Ray either, I had to bring him at 4am, but he found a ride home because he knew how bad I felt, so that was nice :)

Got a Cold, but it's OK :)

Tessa left a comment yesterday about how we are used to food being our comfort, and how easy it is to go back to that when we are sick. That is SO TRUE for me. Hit the nail right on the head. I guess it's a good thing that yesterday, it wasn't very comforting. All it did was make me feel bad. I guess that is due to the changes I've made... though I have MANY more to make- the ones I have made have really changed me already. Take counting calories. Before- I couldn't care less about calories, but in the few short weeks I have been keeping track, now it's just natural for me! Not being able to count them and knowing how over board I must have went yesterday really bothers me! lol, also a good thing I guess.

If you were to look at me today, it would seem I have a horrible cold and must feel miserable. I have a runny nose, a cough and soar throat. BUT- the cough is very productive thankfully, and I actually feel pretty good :) A lot better then yesterday. I had burger king today... BAD IDEA. Unlike yesterday when I was starving, today I'm not really hungry at all. And when I ate that whopper I usually love, it didn't really taste very good (it didn't help that Burger King has no tomatoes either lol). So anyway, my cold was really acting up. I won't be graphic lol, but it did NOT stay in my stomach.

I'm going to make sure to eat a little even though I'm not hungry, or else I will probably feel really sick later. But honestly- despite all this I really do feel great lol.

Here's My Day:
Breakfast: Nothing
Lunch: (0?) Whopper and 3 fries... for a couple minutes anyway... Water
Lunch again: (146) 18 grapes, 2 strawberries, 2 tbs fruit dip. Water
Snack: (130) Fiber Plus Bar- dark chocolate almond
Snack: (160) 15 Lay's sour cream cheddar chips
Dinner: (559) Asparagus stuffed chicken, 1 cup broccoli with cheese, 1/2 small potato, 2 baby carrots, 1 cup FF skim milk
Drink: (200) Beaumont Iced coffee 9.5 oz (cheaper version of a frappuccino)
Snack: (340) large bowl of multigrain cheerios w FF skim milk
Total Water: 54 oz
Total Calories: 1535
I got pretty hungry before dinner, and again after dinner... but I did ok...
I still feel pretty good, nose is bothering me more though lol. I am VERY tired. I will be going to bed pretty early I think.
We're going to have a fun day for my son tomorrow. We still have a little money left and he doesn't have school. We are going to the movies to see How to Train Your Dragon.
Then we are going to go eat lunch at his favorite place- Old Country Buffet... I know- SCARY. I really don't feel like I should be going to a buffet, not only because I don't feel good but because I don't think I am far enough along in my journey to be good at one!!! BUT it is my son's day :) and since my fiance and I don't like that place very much, we hardly EVER go. Less then once a year. BUT like I said, the food is OK, definitely not one of my favorite places... but for some reason that never stops me from making a pig of myself! So much to choose from... and the fact that when you pay for a buffet like that you want to get your money's worth! (that's how I think anyway lol) But I am going to try really hard to take my time and really think about what I am putting on my plate. I just hope I still feel good and my nose gets a little better. Otherwise I might just send them to eat with out me. I'm not going to a buffet with a runny nose lol. Gross!!! LOL.
Treadmill: 20 minutes/.67 miles (5 of that with 2 LB weights)

Took a Sick Day...

That's the only way to describe it I guess.
I woke up and didn't feel good. I must be getting a chest cold. I didn't do anything all day except eat. Now on top of not feeling good I feel like crap because I ate to much. Ugh... tomorrow will be better, whether I feel better or not.

Here's My Day (unfortunately):
Breakfast: Begal and cream cheese. water
Snack: 2 leftover taco shells with cheese and salsa
Lunch: 10 0z sierra mist. A wet burrito (that wasn't even good)
Snack: 14 grapes, 1 large strawberry 2 tbs fruit dip
Dinner:  a little left over pot roast, 1/2 potato, 5 baby carrots. FF skim milk
Snack: 2 bowls of cereal (Lucky Charms, honey bunches of oats strawberries) w 2% milk
Total Water: 41 oz
Total Calories: A LOT
I don't know what I was thinking :( I didn't feel good and felt like I was hungry ALL day. There are going to be days I don't feel good- but eating really didn't make me feel any better. Only worse. I just have to make sure I remember that tomorrow. I'm pretty tired so I'm not going to count calories today, I know it's A LOT.

Treadmill: 20 minutes/.6 miles (5 minutes of that with 2LB weights)
I rubbed part of my heel raw last night on my 80 minute walk- I didn't even feel it till I got in the shower! STING. So tonight was a little hard walking. I put a bandage on and walked pretty slow.
I hope everyone else had a better day then me!!!!
See you tomorrow.