Saturday

What I ate Saturday:
Breakfast: (230) Fiber Plus Bar- Dark Chocolate almond, 1/2 an iced coffee
Lunch: (335) Turkey/pepperoni sandwich with banana pepper rings and 1 tbs miracle whip on whole wheat. 5 big baby carrots w 1/2 tbs light ranch, water
Snack: (170) ice cream twix bar
Dinner @ Mom's: cheese burger on bun, hot dog on bun, about 1 cup potato salad, about 15 potato ships with dip, 1/2 bratwurst no bun, water
Snack @ Mom's: toffee ice cream bar
Total Water: 48 oz
Well, as you can see it was another cookout without good results. Not a huge family cookout, just everyone that lives there and us 3. So at least I didn't have all the extra sides... but I still ate way to much. I brought my water and stayed away from the pop.
I got different bread, didn't go to my regular grocery store but needed bread. It is 10 less calories for 2 slices, but to grainy for me. AND not 100% natural, it will do until I go get my Arnold's Soft Family bread :)

We went to Mom's and it wasn't bad. I told my son he was "NOT spending the night so don't ask" and he didn't. Her boyfriend was back, everything seemed... ok. Of course she hadn't called and told me anything about it so all I knew is what I saw. He wasn't drinking, she didn't smoke any weed while we were there, so it all seemed ok. BUT, she is manic. VERY manic right now. Even though the kitchen was trashed, she was in the living room cleaning up the table, and had my little brothers room all cleaned up for him... (By little, I mean my youngest at 24. NO need for her to clean his room) She is in a Super Good mood, and at the same time snapping at her boy friend for little things... For the most part she is very happy. This will end soon though, she will go around cleaning and doing a lot of unnecessary things... and enjoy her yard while not having a clean dish in the house... and in a few days she will be worn out and look around and it will all hit her... and she will be back to how she was. If she's lucky, she won't be extra depressed... she still expects to have my son over Tuesday, but that's not going to happen. That is right around when I predict she will be done with her manic state and falling down... her weed will continue to calm her at times, but won't fix anything.
Right now she thinks everything is on the way up. She thinks this is the beginning of a change, and all will be well. But I've seen it all before. It's ALL I've seen as far back as I can remember. It would be nice, but it's just now how it is... Sure, she is on her way up- but the higher she goes the further she usually falls...
I love her, and I know a lot of it is her 'bipolar.' But at the moment I am very tired, and don't have the energy to deal with it all. I am able to kind of detach. I've been doing it more and more as I get older. I see it all, but not so much with my daughters eye... more with a clinical eye of someone not even related to her... Like a doctor or nurse I guess.... does that even make sense? It does in my head lol...

We stayed and watched the fights. My son was outside roasting marshmallows with her and his Papa for some of it. I visited a while between fights. Like I said, all in all it was fine. We didn't get home till 1:15, and went straight to bed. I was SO tired.
Didn't get in any treadmill. Ugh.