Yesterday- BAD, Today... BETTER

Yesterday I ate, and ate, and ate some more!!! I wasn't thinking it at the time, but I think I hit rock bottom. I think I was actually back to where I was before Jan 1st 2010. I ate whatever I wanted, whether I was hungry or not. It was HORRIBLE.
I can't even remember everything I ate... as painful as it is, I will try!

Here's what I ate yesterday:
5am snack: Large Bowl of cocoa  krispies ff skim milk
Breakfast: Fiber One bar with 9.5 oz iced coffee
Snack: A lot of pasta salad
Snack: 1/2 cup (only because that's all there was left of) crap salad with 3 large crackers
Snack: large bowl of ice cream
Lunch: 1/2 frozen pizza with light ranch
Snack: iced coffee
Snack: a few tortilla chips
Dinner: about 20 tortilla chips and cheese, 2 cups of taco soup, ff skim milk
Snack: another large bowl of ice cream
Total Water: 40 oz

Ugh, it was horrible. But I didn't think so at the time, I thought it tasted good and I didn't care. WHY? I have NO idea. BUT today I felt awful about it. Knowing that this is the first time I actually feel like I am right back where I started. So today I didn't want to over eat. I want to start over.
I definitely need to improve, but I did better. I went to the store where they sell those cookies I was eating the last few days (the best chocolate chips cookies I ever had) but I walked right by them. I KNEW that if I bought them I would eat all of them.

So here's what I ate today:
Breakfast: Fiber Plus Bar, 9.5 oz iced coffee (which I nursed for about 2 hours)
Lunch: Tuna Sandwich on whole wheat, 7 baby carrots with 1 tbs light ranch, water
Snack: 1/2 cup pasta salad
Snack: about 1 cup of ice cream
Dinner: Romain Salad with cheddar, croutons and 2 tbs light ranch, 2 medium slices of pepperoni pizza (take home and bake from grocery store) water
Snack: Chocolate eclair ice cream bar
Drink: iced coffee
Total water: 40 oz

I definitely need to improve, but I don't feel like it was just mindless eating of the last few days. I am not going to return to that.

If you have been reading what I eat at all, you will know that I used to have these 9.5 oz bottles of Beaumont iced coffee (cheaper but just as delicious version as a starbucks frappuccino) once in a while as a treat. Then everyday. Now it's twice a day an usually with something else sweet!!!! That HAS to stop. ONE a day for now, and with NOTHING. It is a treat by itself and I don't need cookies or anything else with it! I need to ween myself off of those things!!!

It is SOO hot and humid today. I am having trouble staying away from the ice cream. I bought those little freeze pops tonight, and am hoping that will satisfy the cold sugar cravings. Not the best thing, but a lot less calories then ice cream! I know, have to start eating my fruits!!

It is raining right now, which is good. It is bad because there is no way I can get on the treadmill tonight, I would not be able to breath because it is so humid. I swear to you I am sweating just sitting here writing this. But it is good because it keeps all the ignorant pieces of shit that live here inside! I haven't talked about where I live yet... and I'm not going to in detail right now. I just get so angry, these people should be thankful they have somewhere to live- but instead they are out causing trouble, ruining this place. It gets worse every summer. I don't complain often (I think this is the first time since I started this blog) because I KNOW there are worse places to live. Even though I am frustrated with it at the moment, I am thankful to have a roof over our heads believe me. I guess it's because it's summer, and that brings out all the idiots... So even though it's hot and miserable, I am very happy when it rains at night. Keeps things quiet around here. Ok, sorry about that- enough complaining for one night :)

We will probably turn the air on tomorrow, so I will be on the treadmill for sure!!!!

Thanks again for all of your comments on my last post. It really meant a lot to me.