I tried, I really did. I was in bed at 10:58pm last night. When the phone rang, I thought it was HOURS later! But it was only 11:25pm. I couldn't get back to sleep... I ended up downstairs watching TV, and had a bowl of cereal. I'm still happy with how I did yesterday over all.
About that phone call. It was Ray's cousin D. He was over at ray's brother's (which is in here, a 1 minute walk away) with another friend and I'm sure wanted Ray to come over and hang out. Ray hasn't seen the friend in about 5 years. But Ray was sleeping since he had to work this morning.
WELL, Ray gets another call today, this time from his brother. He tells ray how They had all been drinking, and sometime last night D and the other friend went home to D's house. This morning the friend didn't want to get up at about 10 when D checked on him. The next time he checked on him was a couple hours later. He was foaming at the mouth and his face was blue. He was dead.
Ray didn't say much. He just sat, and texted his cousin (who isn't doing very well I hear) and got no response.
I just tried to give him space. When I looked at him I could tell he was crying and I felt so bad. The friend must only be about 25 years old... it's just so crazy and so sudden. Ray didn't say so, but I wonder if he feels bad that he didn't go over there last night... I am feeling that he thinks it was his last chance to see him, and he should have been there... but he was sleeping. He never even heard the phone rang...
It just really makes you think. A healthy young boy like that, here one minute- gone the next.
What I ate today:
10:30am? Drink: 1/3 iced coffee
12:30pm Lunch: Tuna Sandwich (1 tbs MW, pickles, 1/8 cup mozz) on whole wheat, 8 baby carrots, 1 tbs light ranch, water
7pm Dinner: 2 cups broccoli tuna helper, 1 slice parmesan toast (whole wheat bread, country crock, Parmesan) 3/4 cup peas.
9pm Snack: 6 oz yogurt- strawberry shortcake
10:20pm Snack: bagel with cream cheese
Total Water: 50 oz
Tuna for lunch and dinner wasn't planned. But you know I love tuna anyway :) Didn't need 2 plates at dinner. I am over all ok with today except for the bagel. I wish I didn't have that, should have had grapes...
Tomorrow will be better. I am determined to get on the treadmill tomorrow!
Going to watch a movie with Ray. Will be up late but he has the morning off so I will get some sleep. have a good night everyone.
HBD
2 days ago
What can I say? This is horrible Tina, but Ray shouldn't feel guilty - it was a Monday night and the man had to work - of course he couldn't go over and hang out - and even if he had been there he couldn't have stopped what this young man suffered from - I know. Empty hollow words. That won't change a thing - but Ray will realize one day that this isn't his fault. The young man went to sleep and something caused his death - something Ray and his cousin couldn't have predicted.
ReplyDeleteHope you all have a quiet evening. Please give him my best. Thinking of you both.
My thoughts and prayers are with you both at this time. There is probably nothing that anyone could have done for him. It is extremely sad when someone so young passes away but I am a firm believer that we have no say in our beginning or our end. Don't focus on the end but on all the wonderful memories that Ray has of him. Tell him not to blame himself, he is not responsible for what happened. I'll keep this short tonight as I know that you need your space. Take care. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThank you both so much, your so kind.
ReplyDeletehugs.