Sunday, May 2, 2010

Saturday, Not So Good...

Here's My Day:
Breakfast: nothing
Lunch: 1 tiny sloppy joe (was gross), 2 hot dogs with ketchup NO buns, 1/4 cup macaroni salad, about 8 BBQ chips, 3 bites my pasta salad, water
Dinner: Ordered Vitale's- 1 medium slice and 2 small slices of BBQ Chicken pizza, 2 bread sticks, pizza sauce, about 16 oz cherry pepsi
Total Water: 15 oz plus 20 oz Sobe Life Water
Total Calories: A Lot

Went and did the sale again today. Made about $25 for both days. Definitely not good money, but worth the time with some family. I am even MORE burnt. It is painful and I don't expect to get much sleep. I don't think I've EVER been this burnt before... and it was cloudy today, even a little rainy!

Today and yesterday I bought a life water to make sure I didn't drink any pop over there during the cook outs... and I came home and drank pop both days!!!! What's up with that?!?! I did all around bad today, and to top it off I didn't do the treadmill... I am feeling pretty miserable with the burn, and the cramps from TOM. I just can't do it tonight. I am very tired. I'm going to bed, but can't lay on my stomach or side so I'll be staring at the ceiling for a long time I'm sure... Ugh...

Having a little family stress too... me and my mom have been ok, I should have stayed away from her lol.
We are still ok, it's just... talking to her can be... I can't even explain it. If you know anyone that's bi polar, she is coming down from a happy "manic" week or so. She is still happy, and talking non stop like all week, but then also snapping at everybody, mostly her boy friend, for... nothing.
She also has all these big ideas about what she is going to do, when in reality they are impossible. I try not to get frustrated when she is telling me all this bull sh*t, but it's hard. I think I did fine, but talking to her can be so... exhausting. To make it all worse her mother's birthday (my grandma that disowned me and my whole family) was yesterday, and she called and talked to her... and it went well, but now she's thinking and talking about that whole situation too... I'm trying to just forget all about my grandma... and her horrible daughter that made her disown us all. Right now they are at the front of my mother's mind... ugh... anyway...

Tomorrow is another day. I feel sick that I ate so much CRAP the last couple days. I am going to start fresh tomorrow and get on the treadmill no matter how I'm feeling. One day off is bad enough, but the longer you go without doing something the harder it is to get back at it! I CAN'T stop doing the treadmill, no way!
Tomorrow will be better...

4 comments:

  1. Starting fresh tomorrow, you and me both.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I had a bipolar daughter-in-law for about 3 years. Total disaster for our son. So, I know what you are talking about in dealing with that disorder. Hang in there.

    The sun will come out, "tomorrow" just like Annie sang.

    Margie M. writes at:
    www.myhealthylivingthruweightcontrol.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. I hope today is going better for you.

    Living with people that are bipolar can be very hard...I should know because I'm bipolar 2 and I know how exhausting I can be. :-) Just do the best you can and know that her grandiose plans and fast talking are her brain's way of trying to get some relief from something very painful.

    Hope that helps. Remember that you are doing great, and that you can keep it up!

    Audra
    scribblinginthemargin.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thank you all for your comments :) It really is motivating.

    Thanks Babe, I have dealt with her all my life and once in a while it gets to me. She may be trying to get away from the pain her sister and mother have caused her... Usually I am more patient... maybe its the period or the horrible sun burn, but I just didn't want to hear it yesterday.

    I hope I never offend anyone with bipolar, I would never intentionally do that. I may be "bipolar" (my mom likes to think so) but I don't go to the doctor ever, so who knows.

    I will go more into my mom's bipolar some other time, I think her main problem is Selfishness... and her "Bipolar" is so much worse in the years since she had a doctor tell her that she was... when she gets diagnosed with something, that thing gets worse. In my opinion, because now she has an excuse... yeah it's a long opinion that I'll save for another time lol.

    Anyway, thanks for visiting me and your comments are always welcome and appreciated!

    ReplyDelete